Single Status Update
I will be gone for the majority of today and tomorrow. I have to go to the chiropractor and then a lot of other really random stuff. Then tomorrow I will just be busy in general (because of you know what h a ha). In all honesty I really hate my birthday. I never really celebrated it growing up and now I suddenly have real friends to celebrate it with, so it's a bit nerve wracking and weird for me. I'm turning 14 tomorrow, or in a few hours for some of you. It's pretty crazy to me, especially because I feel so much older than I actually am. But some of you do actually think I'm older than what I really am (I'm not 21 thank you very much).
Please don't open the spoiler unless you want to hate me.Spoiler
I was just leaving to go with my mom and my brother to the chiropractor and my mom just straight up started yelling at me because my brother asked "Why is Phebe coming", because the chiropractor is for my mom and my brother and not me. My mom started telling me I think everything is for me and stuff but I seriously don't understand, because she says she gives everything to me yet she makes me do everything. She literally gives brother everything and makes him do nothing. And because of what my brother said, my party has now been cancelled. I don't know if it's just because my mom lost her temper or it's actually cancelled. The issue is, I can only contact about 1/3 people who are actually going to my party, so the other two are going to just show up and have it be a waste of their time unless my mom doesn't actually cancel it. I understand that favorites is an issue but whenever I bring up the topic between my brother vs me my mom always takes something away from me or grounds me. She never wants to talk about it no matter how much I want to and she just doesn't care about how I feel towards the issue of unfairness in this house. She always says that she does everything but she doesn't. She constantly makes me help her with so much stuff and yet my brother does absolutely nothing but play video games in his room constantly and do good in school(ish). But it's possible that because I don't do good in school my mom just automatically hates me or something. It's not fair because I try my best, but I'm a procrastination queen.
In all honesty I'm not all too upset, since I knew this was probably going to happen. It always happens, she constantly loses her temper over this stuff and cancels/takes away things that I'm looking forward to or enjoy doing. She thinks it's going to make me change but it's really not going to be changing anything. She doesn't really realize what she's doing. She used to do this constantly back in 2016, and you guys know what happened in 2016? I won't say what happened, but I'm sure some of you know. Some of you know the whole story. But, if she continues this it may happen again. I've been surviving, and around this time the issue would be intense and I'd try what had happened again. But I'm trying to stay happy, but all my mom does is ruin it. She calls me a spoiled brat and stuff. People online tell me that too, because they don't realize what I go through at home. And my mom doesn't realize what I go through at school and online.
I understand if you guys want to call me a spoiled brat too and stuff, but I do all of this stuff for our family and I never get anything back other than Christmas and Birthday money which my brother gets as well. He actually gets more than I do. And I know there are some people who don't even get anything, but still. If my brother had the same issues with me I wouldn't be as upset over this.
I'll just deal with it, I guess. So I won't be gone for the majority of today and tomorrow, guys. I'll be here, and I'll continue to get yelled at. I can't wait till I'm 18 and potentially be out in the streets. My mom has been worse with me ever since I came out as homosexual, now that I think about it. She may not show it but I swear she's a homophobe on some level smh
Don't you ever wonder if you don't find 'the one', you're kinda just stuck? My mom keeps telling me that I'll be out in the streets and my dad tells me I'll never get a 'boyfriend', so in my view, it's like, if I don't find 'the one' then I'll be out in the streets. It puts pressure on me to find someone to spend the rest of my life with, ya know? I know for a fact that I probably won't have a good enough job to be able to pull off life by myself, so basically, I would have to depend on someone else to make sure I don't go starving in the streets. Who knows, I'm still young so I don't know much.